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It is not necessarily a "traditional" notion; that would imply that gender differences are culturally-based, only, and that is not the case. Men and women are different, in almost every way..physically, chemically, emotionally, etc.
So it stands to reason that dealing with an LD man is going to be quite similar, in many ways, to an LD woman but the differences are going to be GLARING



I'm going to try to explain my POV on this issue again. In the history of human biology, men on average have had more testosterone and therefore a higher level of horniness than women ON AVERAGE. I am probably like the average man in terms of my frequency and strength of drive. I have been this way since early adolescence. If I have sex on Monday, I'm okay on Tuesday, I want it on Wednesday, I get cranky on Thursday etc. I was actually sort of amazed to discover how regular my sexual drive is recently. I never really tracked it until I joined this board.

The thing that makes my situation different than the HDM is that I am also, I believe, biologically programmed to expect men to have a higher drive than me. In simplistic terms, I mostly want to be f*cked rather than to f*ck. My sex drive is high but passive. I think the HDM on the board could understand this if they realized that they probably have an opposite but proportional desire to be the passive rather than the aggressive sexual partner. I think men sometimes avoid thinking about sexual dynamics in this way because wanting to be the "bottom" can verge on the homo-erotic. My desire is probably 80% "bottom", 20% "top". It is frustrating for me to have to be the "top" in terms of initiation the majority of the time. I can only push my "top" desire up to a certain percentage of my drive. I am left unsatisfied with even reasonably frequent sex, if I am unable to fulfill my "bottom" desire. It is completely simplistic to think that just a certain number of orgasms per week whether partner or self-generated is enough to satisfy someone's drive. If this were true, why would anyone suffer the social stigmatism of homosexuality?

"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver