Back to Square 2

[MJontheMend]

My question - is there ever a time that we will have a natural flow of sexuality in the R?

I've felt like I was almost there, but somehow it has eluded me. Have you read "Passionate Marriage". I guarantee that the advice given there is worth following even if it doesn't lead to ultimate success. I'm a bit burned-out at the moment, but once I rally my energies, I intend to start applying the principles in PM full force once more, because at least I know that I'll get a few full throttle erotic encounters if I make the effort.

The problem is I made improving our sex life my top priority for around 6 mos. this year. I participated in this board, read SSM and PM and applied the principles and I lost weight, got in shape and made myself dress more fashionably. I can't give the problem so much attention endlessly. I need to concentrate on my business, my kids, my extended family and friends, my falling-apart old house etc. It is so frustrating that I can't go into "maintenance" mode on our sex life. Either I am expending a lot of emotional effort and mental energy or I'm not getting laid enough to be comfortable. I wish I could just take a vacation from my marriage and catch up on everything else without having to become celibate. Maybe some LDW and I could just swap for a month or two. She could get a break from the "pressure" of her H's demands so she could take care of her other committments in a relaxed fashion and I could get a break from having to "work" for sex so I could concentrate on my To Do List. It would be like having a sexual handyman just to help me through a hectic time. After the holidays, I would be refreshed and ready to start working on my LDH again.