Quote: A situation I've found myself in frequently since Mr. Wilson turned into Mr. Cuddles is that we'll be getting along wonderfully, maybe even cuddling and joking on the sofa, but I'm afraid to try and take it up a notch because I don't want to "ruin" things. It's like seducing my H is some delicate procedure that I have to be at my best in order to not botch, like brain surgery. If I'm not at my best and I try to seduce him, it goes poorly and I guess I'm more like a butcher hacking at a "piece of meat".
JJ, you hit home on that one. I feel exactly the same way. W has become more accepting of sex since we went on the schedule, but I still feel like I’m walking a tightrope and live in fear of screwing it up.
W has been better, but we still follow the same pattern every time. She NEVER initiates, but in typical LD fashion, she still controls the encounter. I start with rubbing and/or caressing various body parts. Then I begin escalating by moving closer or maybe brushing some of the more interesting parts. I continue that for a while, gradually increasing the frequency and/or amount of time spent in contact with the aforementioned interesting parts until they have my full attention. At any time during this process, W can, and frequently does, put an end to it. Always without comment. If I ask her why, she invariably gives the same response: “I just don’t feel like it.”
This always leaves me in wondering about the real reason. If she cuts me off early, I can accept that she really isn’t in the mood. But what about the more common times where she lets me continue for as much as half an hour and to the point where I’m giving the interesting parts my full attention. When she cuts me off then, is it really because she doesn’t feel like it? Didn’t she know that when the process started? Was she interested, but I screwed it up my moving too fast (she definitely likes a slow and gradual buildup approach)? Too slow so she lost interest? Is she a desire follows arousal person and gave it some time to see if she was getting aroused, then cut me off when she realized that she wasn’t?
Reading what I’ve written, it’s dawned on me that I really need to put these questions to her rather than to y’all. So why is that so d*nmed hard to do?
All of which brings me back to the original reason I replied to you in the first place – to tell you that I fully understand the “delicate procedure that I have to be at my best in order to not botch” that you mentioned.
