Honeypot?

[MJontheMend]

If you don't like what I said, then say so. I don't think what you are doing is even remotely entertaining.

I apologize. I realize that I am being flip about something I should be taking seriously, but I am in the grips of some sort of nihilistic despair about the issue at the moment.

Let me explain my emotional reaction to your "coaching". At this moment in time, I see you and Mrs.NOP as the one example of a truly successful resolution of the SSM problem on this board. Therefore, perhaps the sensible reaction I should have to your advice would be to simply swallow it whole, thinking "It worked for them. It should work for us too." and thank you kindly for taking the trouble of wanting to help those still in need of help. OTH, I think to myself that it must be kind of lonely being in your position. If I were you, I would feel more secure in my success if others were to achieve similar success through similar means. Therefore, you may be offering me advice that was valid for you, but not so valid for me. I am particularly suspicious of advice when it is based on circular logic such as the reasoning that the possibility for "wild animalistic" sex and the possibility for a committed long term relationship are mutually exclusive. This just doesn't ring true for me. As a life-long member of the HD tribe, I know that factors outside my current relationship can affect my drive in a positive as well as negative ways. Perhaps if I were married to a HD man, familiarity would breed lowered drives for both of us and we would settle into a not so exciting routine, but sometimes when the stars were aligned just right, when the cleavage flash collided with the stalled elevator or the free hot tub upgrade collided with the blizzard or the new leather jacket collided with the hip-hop on the radio, maybe there would be two of us with that glazed-eye look of animal hunger ready to forget it all and f*ck because once again as in the immortal words of Foreigner "It feels like the first time.".

I guess what I'm trying to say is that you and Mrs.NOP have what you want and I am very happy for you (really!), but I might not want what you want and I might not be able to get what I want in the way you got what you want. I need to muddle through on my own. I hope that is okay even if what I have to say isn't always in the spirit of this board.

Once again, I apologize for being flip and rude. I know you were trying to be helpful and I am some sort of ungrateful wretch.

Sincerely,

JJ and her alter-ego MM