Quote: This MO might work for an HD male but I can tell you that it does not work, on a permanent basis, for an HD female. At some point, I will have to FEEL his desire for me and have the majority (not minority) of our encounters be intentional.
If this does not happen, I will probably fall out of love with him and our marriage will be in name only. This is what scares me.
You're freaking me out, HP. I think I am scared by a similar idea. The only way I can continue to "hold on to myself" emotionally in this relationship is to view it somewhat dispassionately. For instance, find it amusing that my H wanted spring water rather than sex on his birthday. However treating my relationship in this dispassionate fashion makes me feel like I'm less "in love" with my H.
You are forgetting one important feature of life with an LDH in your analysis. As soon as he senses that you are "falling out of love" with him, he will get nervous and start to feel and express some desire and passion towards you and the whole "wonderful" cycle will start all over again.
Jenny- not bitter or jaded but something in between with a dash of humor.
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
