I do reward the 'good behavior'. In fact, 99% of the harsh things I say remain right here, on this bb. I have to get them out here, so that I don't blast him with them.
And, truly, Nicegal the harshness comes into play because I have said the same things..and made the same requests for YEARS now. At what point does he either agree to try or say f*ck you, I'm never gonna do that?
Why keep making promises that he is too lazy to keep? (and that's not me making a slam on him, he wrote me this morning and described himself as such)
I am actually very easy to please. But he chooses to please himself instead so what can I do?
He even had the NERVE last night to say, Well this is not a night that's on our schedule. You said Tuesday, Thursday and Saturdays.
I said, H!! You would not agree to the schedule and now you want to pull it out because it suits your mood?!
He is something, I tell ya.
As far as his ego, yes, I'd say his sexual ego is pretty much smashed to smithereens. In some ways I am to blame for that. I said some pretty awful things to him in the beginning. I have taken responsibility for that and stopped that behavior. I also apologized for it. I'm sure those mean words still ring about in his head and I would take them back if I could.
As far as recent behavior goes, I'd say that his OWN behavior is what reduces his ego. I contribute to this because I refuse to put up with less than what I deserve--and what we both agreed upon. He wants to cop out and then wants me to prop him up and make him feel better about his choice. I don't do that. I get the impression that he (and perhaps other LD people) wants the positive reinforcement when they meet their partners needs and also when they don't--in the form of "It's okay, I know you mean well" etc. I am only human and I get sick of propping him up. I want him to take responsibility for his OWN ego.
I hope this doesn't sound harsh. I am in a VERY direct mood today, that's all!
