I have had two dreams in the last week where my DD3 ends up dead. In one, she is on one side of a busy street, sees me, and, although I don't actually see it, I know she is hit by a car. In the second dream, she is sad, goes and lays down in a pothole in the middle of the road, is missed by many cars, and then one changes lanes at the wrong time and . . .
Just the most awful dreams one could imagine. I mentioned these to a friend I have who knows my situation and he says that he thinks these represent my mind working on my relationship with W . . . destroying the one thing that really binds us together.
I know that dreams are just dreams. These are powerful, and painful, and make me not want to go to sleep anymore. Understand, of course, that I love my DD3 deeply, and would never do anything to harm her. My friend's intepretation bothered me, though. Both my W and I have, in anger, said that DD3 is the only reason we are still together. And during our last "talk", when I told her that I would not stay in a sexless marriage forever, I basically said that if I determined that it was in DD3's best interests not to live in a house with two parents who didn't know how to show love to each other, I would probably leave.
Just venting this a.m. I need to get some errands and chores done. I may not get to check in until Monday, so have a great weekend everyone.
