I still desperately want to save my M. I love my H and I'm working realy hard to not allow negative thoughts affect my willingness to fight for the M. I don't have proof that he has been having sex with OW. I don't have a proof that he hasn't been either.
When I ask him what is there that I could do for him he says it needs to be in action - actions will show him that I am "trust worthy". He keeps talking about always having hope.
Denying him sex is what got me here as well as not verbally showing him my love (his love language seems to be words of affirmation and physical). I have fear that if I stop having physical contact with him he might see it as I really don't want it and that nothing has changed. I'm going to call DB coach and see what he/she thinks about the situation but I was also thinking about saying to him: I would really want to have sex/ML to you but I can't do it when you are involved with someone else. I desire you all the time and I would love to show you just how much but you have to be honest with me...(okay, this is where I get lost - I don't feel I can demend him to finish things with OW since he wants the D and he does not want me so I don't want him to view it as pursuing but then on the other hand how else am I suppose to have him change things?)
