Laurie: I have to comment about getting the SO to read the books. Specifically, I left a very loving note for her and asked her to read SSM because I thought it did a good job of describing the way I felt.
You would have thought I left a bomb and a book about eating live babies. She totally lost it. If you've been reading any posts about my W, you're probably not surprised. YMMV.
Someone on here got the SSM book thrown at them.
Others have had great success, e.g. their spouses agree to read it, and it sits on the nightstand for months collecting dust.
But actually, some people have had better luck than average. Just don't go into this expecting that your spouse will suddenly see the light and all will be right with the world. It doesn't usually happen that way.
