I feel like pretending I was never away and just posting as if you all knew what happened yesterday, the day before, and this morning! It's work to go away from the boards!
Vermont and TG were good. Parts were great, parts were difficult, and parts were bad. Briefly, S. and I turned the corner on how we talk to each other, starting out last week in old mode (sniping and stonewalling), and ending up last night as we drove back in a new kind of conversation, based on figuring out our greater narratives (stories based on expectations) and how they relate to our deepest life philosophies.
We continued the conversation today, and in all we are doing a good job of keeping the personalization out of it. It's exhausting to think about at the moment - suffice it to say we are talking more frankly and more openly, with more trust. And it's very much like self-therapy, which is great because it's open and un-personal, but we don't have to pay 150 bucks an hour!
It's a relief, really.
In other news, I am thinking of putting a hold on whether S. will come down with me to spend Christmas with my family - I feel that we need to be clearer (and especially I need to be clear) about where this is going. My family is too important to me to have "just a boyfriend" down. This is not an ultimatum, in fact it's the opposite - going down there last year felt like pressure to him, and this year I feel like I want it to be right. I want the boy I bring home for Christmas to be my life's mate. I haven't said anything to him to this effect yet, but I thought I'd throw it out here, and mull it over some on my own. All thoughts welcomed.
More later - meeting my cousin out for some beers in the neighborhood and catching up.
