Well, last week sucked @$$ at work. Got a speeding ticket on Saturday. The guy even wrote down my last name wrong...makes me wonder if it invalidates the ticket.

But....life is good on the R front. Which makes me feel like the rest of the stresses in my life really are trivial.

H brought up babies twice yesterday. (And he thinks I'm baby-crazy....) He was actually staring--blatantly--at my stomach while we were at a Christmas party. And then commented that he wished I was pregnant. (:))

And then, later, when we were hanging out at BIL2's house, he told me that marrying me was the best thing he had ever done is his life. (:D) And that he couldn't remember or imagine a time when I wasn't a part of his life.

I had a hard time going to sleep last night. Too much chocolate and Christmas goodies, I think. We ML, and I sort of dozed off, and began mumbling stuff to him. I never would have said it if I had been awake.

I was asking him about this time he had said I felt like his sister. Not like his wife. That he said he wasn't that attracted to me anymore. (Typical WAS, obviously.) He had the great timing of telling me this on our drive down to the viewing for my grandmother's funeral. (Nice timing, huh?)

H told me he had never meant it. Said that he was very attracted to me. I don't know what to make of it--just going to file it in under "WAS Weirdness" and leave it at that.

I apologized, told him I hadn't meant to bring it up. He said it was okay. He then told me there was one thing he kept running over and over in his mind... When he had asked me to leave the apartment, I had begged him to just let me stay...that we would figure out something. And how he had just wanted to hold me and tell me everything would be okay, but he didn't. That he wished, more than anything, he could take that back.

At the time, I can remember seeing a flicker of doubt is his eyes. But I hadn't been sure if I was just seeing what I wanted to. I remember thinking, at the time, that he didn't seem to happy with himself.

But then we started talking about other things. Distraction seems to be the best remedy at this point.

Can't wait till Christmas. I'm cooking...gonna get stuff full of turkey and play video games. And, after the new year, I should have some vacation coming. Yay!

[color:"purple"]Nevanna[/color]