Sage, you just reminded me...H mistakes my being distant with my being angry. I get distant when I'm hurting, and don't know how to cope, and am afraid of going to him. (In the past, he didn't do well with me when I got all messy...like before he left for San Diego...although he was great this time. ) He thinks that means I'm going to leave him.

But, at the same time, I don't want to overwhelm him. When I get really distraught, it just makes the guilt that much worse for him.

Kind of a careful balance.

I think this may also be what's behind his frequent comments that he would forgive me if I were to have an A. He's hoping that I really do forgive him. (I do, just still hurts...althought not nearly as bad.) And, that way, he wouldn't feel as guilty for slipping up. (At least, that's what I think he thinks...lol...hope that makes sense.)

[color:"purple"]Nevanna[/color]