Guys - You are just the best We had a wonderful dinner, NG was attentive, and I feel cherished. He is on a work related conference call, and here I am.

LnL - you know, I can be a blotch Its one of the things I'm trying to shed, the urge to 'be right' all the time, and justify being less than nice, or kind. Until recently, I had not realised just how much of a child is I'm still carrying around inside me. But, she is growing up.

Maya - Sharing duties and GAL are the areas where I think it has been my expectations of an R that has made me plough the particular trench I was in - NG actually had few expectations, but of course, was not going to object if I chose to do more. Neither was he effusive in his appreciation. I think he saw much of the same dynamics with his mum and sisters - the 'woe is me, having to carry the weight' and NG must have decided early in life that he will not ask for more than he was willing to do himself.

Kelly - I love the idea of planning, and throwing in 'you are awesome' - and NG loves compliments

Jennifer - Have I said that I now script most conversations - and its all due to your inspiring posts For someone I have never met, you have had such a profound impact on how I manage the day to day of my life - thank you !!

Tonight, another piece of our healing journey fell in place. NG is slowly becoming more aware of just what baggage he still carries around from his childhood. He is not yet ready to term it as 'problems' but at least shared with me that he sees how his self esteem issues may have steered him 'wrong'. What else was there for me to do, but validate, and not jump in with conclusions he is not ready for. With every one of these conversations - which tend to happen about once a week - I am feeling more at peace, that my fear this a may have been my fault, really is unfounded. It all helps.

In the meantime, we are living our life. One day at a time. Improving aspects of it slowly. Continuosly.

Good night, all.

Slowly

A Liberal Allowance of Time