Slowly,
Has NG ever given any indication of a desire to work through, either individually or with you, the issues underlying the A? While a cooling-off period seems desirable, and you show him you won't bite his head off , it seems that healing will require something more than business as usual. Does he feel he has lost face? Does he feel he has gained something in terms of recognition of his issues? What about yours?

I worry a lot about the possibility that H might come back some day (!)....wanting him to feel that his deeply felt concerns are addressed, and wanting a new arrangement for myself as well. H is deeply afraid of losing face, I think, too.

Seems to me that reconciliation is the harder (because, no fantasy about who this person is) but possibly more rewarding path. But it sure seems steep in parts, and long.

GBO

PS How great that your attorney told you, in front of NG no less, that you look wonderful!