NG is fast asleep, while I just had too many thoughts churning through my mind, and decided if I could not sleep, I should at least put the time to good use. What triggered this departure from peace?

This evening, as we wrapped up work for the week (we were both working from home) the usual question of what's for dinner came up. So, half jokingly, I say, I'll cook one of his favourites if he will wine and dine me in style tomorrow. NG looks at me, says yes, and then says, boy you have a lot of demands. Now, at that time, I just said yes, and he better get used to it (remembering Ellie's not needy, but demanding, repartee) but then it occured to me that a simple expression of desire is being interpreted as 'demand' - ugh

Earlier this afternoon, we were at the lawyers, finalising paperwork for the sale of the flat, and it was wonderful to see our lawyer (who is a very dashing gentleman) say hello politely to NG, and when his eyes fell on me, they lit up, and he says "Slowly, you look wonderful " - and it then occured to me that NG has not paid me a single compliment since the end of the a - and I know from friends, colleagues and other acquaintances that I have not looked better in decades So I'm sitting here wondering what gives.

He clearly wants me to be around as much as possible, is kind and present, but almost in a brotherly way, except of course for the ML. But even then, it is not the high'romance variety

I know, it will take time to restore, but darn it, some days I just wonder if I'll have the satying power.

Vent over.

Slowly

A Liberal Allowance of Time