I think your progress is amazing. Not only the relevations for him, but how you handle them. It is definitely working!
Yes, guilt is a bummer. It took me years to come to terms with it, and I hadn’t even betrayed the one I swore to love, honor, and forsake all others for. And yes, it is an ongoing process. I also wanted to comment on something you said a few posts back – that understanding the “why” of the affair is an important part of the relationships’ healing. While I can’t disagree, I did want to point out one thing: one reason why first-time affairs happen is sheer stupidity. You don’t recognize the warning signs. Most of them start out as a friendship ….. which, with a member of the opposite sex, is always a potential slippery slope.
Add to that a rough point in the relationship, with the “friend” a sympathetic listener, and bang you’re in the middle of trouble. I personally consider myself much more “affair-proof” because I now know all the warning signs. No friendships with members of the opposite sex that don’t include your spouse, never talk about relationship problems with a “friend” of the opposite sex (except here on MB ), in fact mention your spouse in some oblique way the first time you speak …. In other words, never consider yourself “safe” (nobody is), but always work on maintaining healthy boundaries. Obvious things, but many people simply don't consider them. It might be something you could discuss with NG should the timing be right.
), in fact mention your spouse in some oblique way the first time you speak …. In other words, never consider yourself “safe” (nobody is), but always work on maintaining healthy boundaries. Obvious things, but many people simply don't consider them. It might be something you could discuss with NG should the timing be right. 
