Porn is very demeaning to the female. So many vulgar acts that can only be impressive to the dominate male type, and I mean dominance not high drive/desire. Someone on this board had a gal that went all society on 'em similar to your wife, or maybe it was a clearifying post in this thread that I'm remembering.
That type of porn as most available on the net is directed to that domineering type of male. (Or the testosterone raging teen) That and some woman's studies classes could have tainted her.
I think you are accomplished in your work/studies/learning. What does she do? You've probably said this some time ago but a Recap may help some of us.
Pity me that the heart is slow to learn
What the swift mind beholds at every turn.
Edna St. Vincent Millay