H is a wonderful husband. Part of the problem is that he does a tremendous amount of things for me, the kids and around the house and they make ME feel like ripping HIS clothes off but....that doesn't seem to be an option very often.
I don't characterize his efforts as "failing" but he does. Like you, I don't see the love language concept as a cure all but merely helpful. He seems to best appreciate service things and he likes to get a card or flowers for his desk (works from home) sometimes and I think he also needs non-sexual touching although he doesn't reach out for much of it. When I concentrate on these things he generally seems more positive about life in general. I do think he has some low level depression but it is mainly situational.
It has been this way off and on througout our R. Just before we got married his best friend died and that caused a HUGE downward spiral and there was no sex for about 5 or 6 months. Before that it was better but not as often as I would like. We saw the C then, made some headway and had a wonderful honeymoon. Came home, got pg - had some really fun pregnant sex - he loved that whole thing. Then came baby, bad business times and the current dry spell. I think we have ML about 2 or 3 times since baby came.
