HP, I'm glad you're going to give him "the cards". I was serious in suggesting it!
Your comments today reflect my thinking about it, too. You WANT your H to think about you and sex. I think all HDs want the same thing. The truth is that a LDH/W can control their thinking about sex. They just have to learn HOW and WHAT to think. The cards can give Mr.HP that info.
I read a Christian woman's book on sex and sexuality where the author revealed a lot about the SL she enjoyed in her M (which was pretty much every 2-3 days). She confessed to enjoying sex once they got going, but that she wasn't naturally the type to think about it on her own. This caused problems in the early days of her M, so she began writing "TS" on every 2nd day in her daily planner. The "TS" was a reminder to THINK SEX. It made all the difference in her M and she admitted that she naturally thinks about sex daily as a result, without needing reminders.
I hear Mrs.NOP saying that, too. She doesn't "naturally" think sex, but she chases, gropes, hugs, and kisses NOP because she loves him. IOW, she's trained herself to think and act sexual toward NOP. It didn't come naturally to her, but it becomes more natural the more she does it.
HP, your H is spoiled rotten! He has no idea how great he has it. As you make it clear that you don't intend to be the only one thinking/initiating sex, he will have to change his "natural" sexual behavior to keep his M strong. The more specific you can be in providing info for him to think and act on, the better he can "re-program" himself.
I don't see this as P/A behavior on your part at all! You're giving him the tools he needs to strengthen his M.
