I want to stick up for CeMar. (Ewwwww...I sure hope nobody puts a sexual meaning to that.)
CeDude, I have felt the same things as you at many of the same times as you've posted! On those occasions the only difference in us has been that you would say, "the sky is falling" and I would go for some stupid sexual joke. So, I guess I'm more a light-hearted depressive than you.
I'm not trying to dump on you. Actually, I was trying to give you some hope. The fact that you recognize that you could get more sex by just asking for it tells me that there is hope. Your W would "just say NO" if there wasn't. At that point, you could decide whether staying for your kids was really in their best interest or not. (I decided that it wasn't for mine, btw.)
I hope you don't let past hurts ruin the rest of your life. It really is your choice alone. IOW, you're only trapped if you let yourself be. Your W doesn't have that kind of power over you.
You seem like a smart guy to me. I believe you can find a way to make your M better, at least. If not, God doesn't expect you to stay in an impossible situation (and neither would your kids).
