Cemar, I had a thought the other morning. If you want to see progress and success, go look at my thread(s).
THIS, my friend, is what progress looks like. It is ugly as hell, isn't it.
But it is motion and...if you read long enough, lol...forward motion. It is a stop-and-start thing. Two steps forward and one step back.
It is incredibly frustrating to me but it is STILL better than what it was. There HAS to be something out there that will work for my husband and myself. We truly love each other and want to grow old together. But we are typical human beings who have pride and stubbornness to deal with as well.
Anyway, I just wanted to point out that success doesn't look so hot at first, or while you are in the middle of it. You will most likely have to deal with a lot of duty sex before you start to break on through to the other side. AND....you will have to repeatedly light the fire under your wife's arse and keep it there. These Talks are exhausting but my hope is that one day they will not be necessary. There is no other way, Cemar. You must communicate to her and force the issue and it will be ugly. That is when you will know whether there is anything salvage-able.
Right now you are dancing around the issue and masking your fear with dejectedness and hopelessness. What if you push the issue, only to discover that she won't budge and would rather lose you than become sexual, you ask?? Well that is a risk you take. We are ALL taking that risk.
Success will not come in the form of MrsCemar waking up one day and jumping your bones and continuing to do so until you draw your last breath. It just will NOT happen that way. Conflict begets change. This will sound insane but even in light of the problems I have with my H, I am still FAR happier than I have ever been in my marriage with him, honeymoon phase included.
