It’s not the way I would go, but you’re not me, and our sit’s are different. And most importantly (harking back to my previous post), You have to do what KAW wants/needs to do.
Quote: Stop DBing, KAW. Just be true to yourself.
As an aside, I don’t consider Dobson letters as a DB technique, but that isn’t good or bad. The only thing I think one has to be cautious of is if they are using a Dobson letter as a technique if they aren’t truly ready to accept the possibility that this is exactly what their SO wants.
The only thing I would urge you to consider, KAW is this. Are you ready for any reaction to the letter? What if the reaction is relief that you’ve “finally got it.”
I know you didn’t write the letter to manipulate her, KAW, but I also think that part of you wants the letter to change her mind. I’m not trying to convince you not to give her the letter. I just want you to think about that a little so you’ll be emotionally prepared. Her reaction may hurt more than you think.
