Well, it has happened, we are back to the usual cycle.

This is just a short resume of the weekend.

I got D out from school early and we went off and stayed with friends in the mountains. Nice day on Saturday, then in the evening I got D to call her Dad from my cell phone. I didn't want to us our hosts' phone uneccessarily (because of the expense) and we had to go outside to make the call as the signal was bad inside due to the very thick walls of the old house. During the call, the reception was patchy, and D handed me the phone. H said the signal was bad, I told him where we were and why it was bad, D had gone near the wall when I told her to stay away from it etc, all in a normal friendly voice - I was just explaining the situation - when H get really mad and started being very abusive, saying I wouldn't even spend the smallest f***ing amount on making a phone call to him blah blah blah. Very aggressive and insulting. I was very taken aback and shaking, so I just said, I don't wish to be spoken to like that, I'm sorry, and ended the call. I didn't call back because I didn't want to get into more stuff like that and because I just felt that I shouldn't respond to a stream of abuse.

Of course that preyed on my mind the whole of Sunday, although we had a nice day otherwise. I resented my weekend being contaminated by the abuse.

Sunday evening after we got back home I got D to call H and they spoke.

I checked my email this morning and there were two emails from H, the first one full of abuse, and the second one is long and all about how hard done by he is. The only responsibilty for the ending of our M that he takes, is that in fact he wasn't harder on me! He didn't force me to face reality earlier etc etc.

I will have to come back later, I have a busy day ahead (you know, lying down and twiddling my thumbs). But I feel shaken yet again. All the stuff he talks about is stuff we should really have talked about calmly YEARS ago instead of now in a state of WAR. He is basically putting financial pressure to bear on me yet again. That's not a surprise.

Looks like I'll need some support to get through this coming month. I wonder what things will be like this Christmas??

I was thinking of just sending H an email saying, thanks for your emails, I will reply to you when I am able.

Livnlearn

"The unexamined life is not worth living" - Socrates