Your post intrigued me. Would you care to elaborate?
Quote: It is sometimes too easy to believe that we are the center of someone else's life.
You are saying that when H calls and is upset or angry I make the mistake of thinking it is about me? Or are you saying something else?
In the past few days he has given signs of wanting and needing you back in a more complete way.
What signs? Staying here?
What an opportunity to show support and that you have set personal boundaries as not to suffocate or control him.
I am trying very hard to show support. I am trying to validate him although when he talks about money it is really about my interests against his. It is difficult. He had a quiet period and so have I, workwise and moneywise.
I am also trying to set boundaries for myself, regarding weekends. So far as I know, this weekend H is having D up there with him. I don't really want him to come down at the last minute, as I have planned to work this weekend on my personal project. I will not be able to concentrate with them here. I think it unlikely that he will invite me up yet, but if he does I will seriously consider going.
What I am trying to do is be friendly when he contacts me, let him know that he can come here too if he wishes (but not always at the last minute so that my plans go out the window). I haven't mentioned him staying here after the minor op, or over Christmas yet. I need to raise the subject of Christmas soonish. I don't want to sound too eager or pushy, but I would like to have some idea of what is going to happen. Got any ideas about how to approach this?
Do you see evidence that I am trying to smother him? Honest opinions always welcome here!
And Dazedboy, how go things with you?
Livnlearn
"The unexamined life is not worth living" - Socrates
