I know it probably wasn't how you wanted it to be. But it's possible she's working on heading the right direction. I mean, it doesn't sound like it was completely unenjoyable, was it? She did think of you, and she did initiate. I would view it as a positive step, even if it wasn't exactly what you had in mind.
Is it possible that you could suggest to her (after something like that) when you are both feeling really good that the next time you'd like to be able to take your time? But also, let her know you appreciate what she did.
It's an approach I use with my LDH. It seems that after we ML he's open to suggestions like that.
