Looking backward...but only to move forward

[sage]

I've been wondering about this. Would you advise us to show our spouses DR book after successfully DBing and getting them back home? What are your thoughts on this?

Wonka -- I guess it would depend on the spouse and on what you hoped to gain from showing them the book but my gut reaction is "NO, don't do it".

I think that DR is really well suited to be used by 1 person -- it has all you need to make real changes in your R. I know for pretty darned sure that my h would have run screaming if I had pulled out the book and "offered" it to him in any way, shape or form.

Have you listened to the KLA tapes also by Michele? Those might be better suited to using with a partner (though they are also perfect for the spouse "working" alone).

In the end, though, I just think that it's not necessary and could be detrimental to show DR to the S that's returning -- particularly early in reconcilliation.

Sage