I'm sorry you're going through marital rough times, Suzee and financial difficulties are a particularly hard load to bear.
Regarding retirement/job/career, I come from a slightly different angle. I have always felt that the person in the career/job has the right to change directions without a lot of flack. That doesn't mean that I haven't expressed my opinion over the years regarding path changes, but it does mean that I figured that if NOP was the one dealing with the hours/responsibilities/pain who was I to push him to do something other than what he wanted? Oftentimes those choices were spectacular successes and other times they weren't. I hitched up my overalls and dealt with the bad times without b*tching - I enjoyed the fruits of his successes how could I not work with him through the hard times? I'm just personally uneasy being in a position of pushing for another person to dedicate 40+ hours a week of their life to something that makes their life suck.
Lectures blow chunks, unless you're in school and paying tuition. What sorts of things does he want that he is always getting in which you disagree?
You've mentioned going to C several different times and that they always end up blaming you. What are they blaming you for?
