Quote: I almost want to get into a negative interaction with him just to get it over with.
My gosh, this quote just totally spoke to me. I do this with H when things are not going good, but not going bad either. I can't seem to turn the momentum around so I start a huge fight to make sure that I am in control of the inevitable bad ending.
It's funny and more than a little ironic that I get huffy about always having to make the first positive move towards H, but I will GLADLY make the first negative move towards him, every time.
My own pride will be my biggest downfall, I fear.
Well thanks for those words of wisdom. That really affected me. I wonder what I (or you) could do when that feeling comes to turn the tide the other way?
The problem for me seems to be that I will make a move towards him and get rebuffed and then I am unable to keep the momentum going in a positive direction. I get in a negative space and will then stubbornly sit back and wait (read: force) him to make the next move.
Part of me thinks "If only he'd never rebuff my perfectly acceptable moves!" we'd be fine, LOL.
Oh well, I just sent him a 'thank you' email. I know he has told me not to but I have a better chance of him responding (even if it's to say "shutup!":) than if I say it in person. Last night, I alluded to it afterwards and he ignored me. In a totally benign way, but still he glossed over the fact that I had ever said anything. I want him to HEAR me saying 'thank you, I appreciate what you do' and not gloss over it due to embarrassment or awkwardness.
I am looking forward to a nice weekend with him. We are in a good place and I hope we keep this momentum going.
I think I might address the NOP's scheduled sex idea this wkend and see what he thinks of it. I'm sure it will be met with resistance but he is the type who says "noooooooooooo" to everything, then comes back a few weeks later and says, You know...I was thinking and that is what we should do.
He just takes a long time to come around to Momma's way of thinkin.
