Okay, well, here's the lowdown on where things are at the moment:
Tuesday night, we attempted LM for the first time in quite a while. I can't remember at the moment just when that was, but I posted about it here, and it was at least a month ago. I had asked on Monday if we could ML, and she put me off until Tuesday night, because DD20 was going out. Turned out, Monday would've been a better night for it anyway.
So Tuesday night we proceeded to get ready for bed, and she was like a lamb led to slaughter - not exactly enthusiastic. S18 was still up and about, and going to bed around the same time (his room is right next to ours). So it wasn't EXACTLY the most private of times, and even worse, W and S18 "butted heads" right before bedtime - she was kind of anxious about him going to bed around the same time. So suffice to say, it wasn't exactly the most loving and erotic (not to mention spontaneous) of times. Not really satisfactory for either of us, and if it hadn't been such a long time, I'd have probably called a halt to it before we even got going, but I was just NOT capable of doing that at this time.
So afterwards, we had a brief talk about it, and it was basically that she can't feel we have any privacy. Which is a REAL bummer, because that situation isn't going to improve anytime soon.
So last evening when I got home from work, W wanted to show me something - she wanted to discuss the possibility of us switching rooms with S18. Turns out his room is marginally bigger than ours, but we initially chose ours because it has a larger closet. However, our furniture would fit better in his room, and she apparently feels it would help her to feel more private if we had that room. I confirmed that part of it with her this morning. Of course, a room switch will mean the need to paint two rooms, and eventually we'd want to buy some new furniture, since now we'd have a room that would work better, and I even suggested that we might be able to get a small TV to put in there, so that we could spend some "quality time" in the room aside from LM so that we might give ourselves more opportunities where the kids wouldn't have to necessarily assume we're ML just because the door's closed.
Anyway, that's where things are at the moment. I think we'll probably do the room switch this weekend, and worry about the redecorating later - if this is going to make a difference, I want to find out early. My feeling is, she's kidding herself if she thinks this is going to materially change how much privacy we have. Our house is small, and not well laid out, and it really does afford precious little privacy. We're starting to talk about possibly looking for a better place, but that'll have to wait until my job situation resolves itself. Realistically, I think we're in this house for at least another year or two. Hopefully we can make things better within that time frame...
