Jennifer, your plans and goals for the weekend sound right on!
On the other question, which would probably be best plummed over a few happy hour drinks (and when ARE you and H2H going to take a western vacation over here--plenty 'o sailing, H2H!, and lots of great food!).....So which of you "three" (hate to glorify Swiss Miss that way) is volatile, in the end? Not that we can box anyone up so neatly, of course.
Okay, I'll be Lucy from Charlie Brown and give you my nickel's worth :
Seems to me that Swiss Miss represents stability, not volatility. (Sorry, my H's Spanish OW takes the cake on that one ). Sounds to me like your H has his own level of chaos going on inside, despite the stable upbringing, materially speaking. The stuff with his dad, combined with a sensititve temperament? He's easily hurt and wants to retreat to a secure and normal place. And yes, you have that volatility too. But you also have that homebody urge underneath, and you are making great, conscious effort to lift up some parts and heal some other parts. So--if your SO is looking for a mix of excitement and domesticity, this could really work.
You can pay me that nickel when you get here.....
Seriously, I think this is part of figuring out what works for you and SO. And makes me think that adding a little happy mystery over in my sitch could really go a long way. I'll never be [exotic-sounding name of OW] nor [exotic-sounding name of his early college not-quite girlfriend from Pakistan] for whom he tied himself in knots....but I can be more than plain Jane Yankee girl too. Hmmmm.
(and when ARE you and H2H going to take a western vacation over here--plenty 'o sailing, H2H!, and lots of great food!).....So which of you "three" (hate to glorify Swiss Miss that way) is volatile, in the end? Not that we can box anyone up so neatly, of course. 
). Sounds to me like your H has his own level of chaos going on inside, despite the stable upbringing, materially speaking. The stuff with his dad, combined with a sensititve temperament? He's easily hurt and wants to retreat to a secure and normal place. And yes, you have that volatility too. But you also have that homebody urge underneath, and you are making great, conscious effort to lift up some parts and heal some other parts. So--if your SO is looking for a mix of excitement and domesticity, this could really work. 
