Quote: I have to figure out what is going on with me that the trust issues are rearing their ugly head again.
J - these aren't your "trust issues" - they're HIS "trustworthiness issues"! I think you had every right to be insulted and concerned by his behavior. What kind of guy invites another woman home from a party to look at his fence then asks his GF if she's going home or not? It WASN'T okay behavior.
Now maybe you could have found a calmer way to let him know that wasn't okay, but I don't think it was a mistake to let him know that wasn't acceptable.
One lesson I've learned in my years and relationships - much as we would like to believe in the innocence of opposite-sex friendships - is that they are inappropriate in a long-term committed R. If you have such a friendship that is truly innocent, then your partner should be included in that friendship. Period.
Patience, J, but don't be afraid to ask yourself if you're really willing to settle for this, if he's not able to grow past this. You're a great, attractive, intelligent woman who deserves a man who treats you well and thinks the sun rises and sets on you. Give him a chance to grow up - okay - but DON'T settle for a guy who continues to think this behavior is okay, ESPECIALLY in light of his past behavior.
