Quote: afools, Thanks for the encouragement! I agree that acting on the feelings is what will get me in trouble with my H. But I don't agree that the thinking is harmless. If I hadn't let my mind dwell on another man than I don't believe I would have had an A with them. After thinking over and over again what it would be like to be with them, eventually doing seems no worse than thinking. At least this is how it happened with me. I think the reason I had the 2 A was/is because of the excitement factor, and also a desire factor. I am a HDW, and feel very taken for granted by my H. I used to see a gleam in his eyes when we were first married, but that has long past. I just don't know how to get that back. I will work on making things more exciting for him...and maybe that will happen if I concentrate on myself being more excited by him.
I can see how it would be hard by spending so much time think about another. It accurs to me that part of this might be because your not getting near the attention you feel you need from H. This is something you NEED to address with him. I'd suggest that you work on that as much as you can from your end. If that doesn't help after sometimes has passed you NEED to push this with your H get some help. If you don't get your R closer to where you feel it needs to be I would say you'll find yourself back in the same sit later. If you let your H think that your happy or at least tolerant of your how your R no effort will come from his part. I hope you can keep it together and get him to move your way.
