You are about to find out how devious I am so please don't feel I am a terrible person. This is from one military wife to another...
Our situations are almost so much alike it is scarey. My H had an A for 18 months. It stopped because I dropped the rope and I mean I dropped the rope.
Whenever my H was around I looked hot, acted as if I was just fine and even happy and content. I got a life and actually really started to enjoy it. But I also played some head games..here comes the devious part.
I sent myself flowers so that he would see them with a mysterious note that said "when your ready" I went on a date. I left clues around the house like books on how to date after a D. I would not answer the phone when I knew he would call. Or if I did I would say I am on the other line did you need something?
My military man went nuts, and secretly I enjoyed it! He started to get really possessive about me. Following me, going through my journal, which I must say was to my advantage because I wrote things about feelings I was having for other men, how I was excited to ML with someone else...you get the picture.
See, sometimes I think they take for granted that we will just always be there and forget that our love is a gift and priviledge, not a gurantee. Sometimes, they really need to see what loss is all about.
I didn't gift him with all of the things he needed from me. That is why your H still comes around he is not getting all that he needs from ow, so you are still fulfilling those needs. When there absent and ow doesn't fill them, then he will feel loss and it will shock the crap out of him. I know it sounds awful, but honestly you have tried everything else, why not go for it.
In fact if you want to teach them both a lesson start getting together with ow's husband...LOL.
Take this advice for what it's worth, either the rantings of crazy women or just a new technique. But remember military men don't like other people on their territory!
