Raindeer, I have told the kids that H no longer lives here, but have not elaborated on anything else. D19 did call tonight and asked again if H was staying with me, but I told her he was not. She made the comment that we sure kept it well hidden over Christmas, which we did just so there was no tension while all the kids were home.
H came over for lunch yesterday, then changed the oil in the cars and did some other putzing around. I took D22 out to look at new cell phone plans, when I got back H was just pulling up from getting a ladder I needed that he had taken to his office. H was in a strange mood since he came over, then when all the kids left H almost ran out the door to leave. I told him he was acting weird again, he kind of nodded and left, but said he would be back in a couple hours to pick me up to go to his sister's.
We had a pleasant few hours with SIL and BIL, then went to pick S15 up from a party. We got there about midnight but son wasn't ready to leave til 2...so H and I just went to a park and took a nap for a couple hours......no hanky, panky.
We got home around 3am, H came into the house and just seemed reluctant to leave and was just putzing around. I finally asked him if he wanted to spend the night....his comment was "if it won't make things harder". He then asked me where I wanted him to sleep and I told him with me. Then it was strange because he asked where I was sleeping and I told him in our bed.
H was out of the house like a bat this morning, but was back a couple hours later to pick us up to go work cows. It was H's idea to pick us KFC to eat with my brother before working cows. As we were ready to leave, brother called and said the weather was too bad to deal with the cows. So here H and I are left with a whole bunch of chicken and fixings and a huge thermos of hot chocolate. H suggested that we go to the farm anyway and share lunch, then I suggested we visit him mom afterwards....so there was about 3 hours of driving time. I had a really nice afternoon.
I feel like life continues to tick away and I am just going with the flow. I cannot figure out anything to change other than going completely dark, and I just do not feel that is the right thing to do.
