Mel, I can't believe this is the same guy either. But, then again, I am the one who asked to meet with him and brought up the R talk. As far as speaking with ow's H, that has always been my intention. There is no way ow is getting off scott-free. And, if it just pushes her and H closer together.....well, their A is almost 5 years old now, so it would not be a surprise.
Jen, thanks for the advice on the book, I will put it on my list. I just hate to see us military wives here. Why is it that our guys are willing to give up their lives for their country but can't quite manage to give up their wanderings?? H told me the A ended 2 years ago and he promised me that if there was ever any contact with ow that he would let me know about it withing 24 hours. (I just found out in Nov. that it has been going on again for many months).
I am just so torn as to which path to choose. I have been on the path of staying friends, making sure H is included in family activities, "acting" the wife part....the whole nine yards. But I am not healing nor am I really accepting that a D is happening.
I know the kids need to be told, but once again I think that the more people who know about it, the harder it would be for H to change his mind. They do know that H has moved out but that is about it.
Raindeer, ya, I fully realize that "not making cookies often enough or not folding his t-shirts the right way" is not really a reason the D someone....although those are reasons H has given. I know H is blaming me for everything, but it is his way of justifying his behavior.
I saw the L again today and felt better after talking to him. I will NOT be a doormat in this D and give in to all of H's demands, nor do I expect to accept with gratitude the paltry amount of alimony H has suggested. The person I talked to last night was not the H I used to know.
An interesting note....H emailed me a comic movie clip of "LifeGuardinthePool"... and just attached a note saying "here's one for you....". I took it as a peace offering since H and I have NEVER emailed one another comic things.
