Wishing, I think you need to really do what you have to in order to be ok financially. The D was his idea...so I hope you don't feel guilty about getting what you deserve. I would think you would be eligible for alimony after so many years of marriage and a stay at home mom. Although in my state, it is hard to get alimony, but all of that changes fro state to state. As far as H and your interactions with him (supper, etc.), I would not make it so easy for him, but that is just me. I think he is doing what alot of people do...he will want what is not readily available for him...in other words, wanting what you don't have. Try not to read between the lines here...he knows you are soft-hearted and he wants to do what ya'll have been doing for years now, his R intact with you and his other life. Until he knows exactly what he wants (which may never happen, but then it might) he will continue to do what he is doing. Personally, I would go a little dark on him and not be so readily available to give him the comforts of home, but Wishing, that is me and I can only tell you what I would do in a sitch such as yours. But only you know how much you are willing to give and put up with at this point. If your true motive is to really be friends with him and to work out your financial future, then you do what you need to as long as what he does doesn't make you angry...he'll only do what you allow him at this point.
