Welcome, nicegirl-- a fresh point of view is always welcome here. When I first joined this community only a few weeks ago, I went back and reread some people's stories from the very beginning. Many on here have been wrestling with these problems for years... reading all the self-help books, being in counseling, etc. Yeah, there is venting and complaining going on, but it feels good to have someone confirm that you're not crazy for wanting what you want. For example Paul just wants to sleep in the same bed with his wife. His wife tries to make him feel like this is completely unreasonable, outrageous, and something that NO ONE would put up with. We're here to tell him "No, what you're asking is within the bounds of reasonable behavior." On these intimate topics, sometimes there's no one else to ask.

I'm very interested in your comments on various situations that you read about on this BOARD (SolidMechanic-- is it a Freudian slip that you refer to this as a "bored"? ). If you have suggestions, toss them into the pot, please. I'd be interested in your take on how a DB coach might respond to some of these situations. Stick around and join in!