I AM feeling a little better today. Molliew, my sitch is buried back a bit, but I DO think that he is using this as an excuse to get free and enjoy his MLC for all its worth. HE had an affair 7 years after mine, so I can't understand why he is so torn up about the details of mine when his lasted a whole year! And again- its now 13 years ago for his and 21 years ago for mine!!! 30 years ago if you count the stuff he was bringinmg up from HIGH SCHOOL!!!!
I still gonna try to call or text tomorrow, but I PROMISE to make it short. a friend of mine gave me some good advice she said every time you feel like talking to him-don't call or text, wait 4 days. if after the 4 days you HAVE TO hear his voice, wait another day. Then call and keep it short. What do you think? Plus in the DR book they say to test the waters every once in a while.If I call him tomorrow, this will only be the 2nd time I have initiated a call since he has been gone in 2 months. He has made all other contact, and I only called him back if he asked me to.
And the ONLY reason I am even attempting this is because he said haven't heard from YOU in a while -the last time we talked(it'll be 5 days Friday) . AND I figured out why I am soo like this this week. We were supposed to go to this big bike thing this weekend and I think I am imagining him taking OW in my place and she will be getting the fun day and t-shirt I was supposed to get and paid for already!!!See, its the little stuff ain't it????
-About going out for me, I could sure use some happier moments these days. All my girl buddies at work either have someone or they are married and don't really go out. We had a nice couple that we went to stuff with, but the guy works with my H and H made a big deal of the keep your distance from my friends thing when we were in the beginning of the break up. Lost may remember, he accused me of sleeping with a friend just because I went to their home (I NEVER went unless his wife was there too, we all knew each other for over 10 years, they were like family to me) But I can't help wondering if I show up at some bike event and H happens to be there will he think
1- I was there looking for him
2-does he think I am there looking for a guy
3- what if HE is there with someone? I would have to leave immediately, I would probably be cordial, but then leave and go throw up or something. HOW do you gals handle this aspect of the "moving on part".Have you seen your H in public with someone else? I don't wanna date anyone, I just want my H to come back, admit he was being a major d**k head, and that he overblew this whole thing and used it as an excuse, and say that he loves me and whatever comes up we'll work on it together.
I promise you both I am trying my best
