Just journaling... Im really missing my H right now and I figured I better sit here and post rather then fall victim to calling him i want to hear his voice so bad right now its killing me, sitting here in tears trying to work through this moment. I just want to talk to him but I know I cant this is so hard I dont know if I can do this much longer I want my H back so bad I literaly feel like a part of me is dying. Everyone says how strong of a person I am but I dont know how much longer I can hold up being strong. I just want to collapse with all this pain Im feeling I feel so alone and abandoned at the moment by the one person I thought would never abandon me. I put my whole body and soul into loving this person and now they are gone and probably gone for good. I just dont know if H will ever want to try and get his family back and Im so close to just totally giving up that he will want us back too. I just wish he would realize what a great family we had and that IT IS worth try to save!!! Ok feeling a bit better not much but a bit LostInFl
