Hi Slowly, I just read through your thread and got caught up. I hope you get to feeling better soon... I will be following your thread very closely, as usual I feel like we are long-lost siblings.... I too am struggling with triggers that create terrible anxiety....then I have a melt down. much of my problem also stems from the knowledge that contact hasnt ended after all the, as you put it so aptly, "fluent lies"... I also just came to the realization that I want what H gave OW....I want the tenderness and romance....he started to give this to me, and seems to have pulled back, so I will be searching for ways to change the dynamics of our R.....as I've told him, I am not going to live the cool, distant life we led before again. So, sister, I'm thinking of you, and as always appreciating the inspiration I get from you! Deb
