Just came across your post, and boy, do you have a lot on your mind! Things are changing, good for you! However, before you let dear H back into your life you need to think of a few things first:
Are your 180's true to you, or are you doing them to get H back? Can you keep them up? I am concerned he keeps blaming you for everything. He is still in the denial stage. And by him letting the OW down slowly and keeping you wainting concerns me also. Keep yourself busy, don't ask any questions, and make sure you on moving on with or without him. The fact that he is wanting to come back is a great sign However, he needs to do it for the right reasons.
I would reccomend a good counselor. If he wants to come back, tell him you would like to talk about your relationship in front of a trained professional, if he is willing to do so. You can't fix him, he needs to recognize he has to fix himself. That is too much pressure for you. Do you really want him back if he is blaming it all on you?
I would go VERY SLOWLY with his returen back to you. Keep your wits about you, chin up, happy face one. Obviously, you have been doing a great job for him to reconsider Just don't rever to old ways. I did just that during xmas week when my H broke up with OW and he went running back. Now, less than a week later, he is hanging around here telling me how confused he is.. Yikes.. My happy face is on, and as Snodderly says, Let the games begin.
Good luck! Keep me posted..Keep your chin up..Remember, believe only half of what you see and none of what you hearbfrom this alien right now..Keep on keeping on!
