Everybody has a little bit of each in them. But inevitibly each of us is a little bit more of one than the other.
Although I've said here before that I've really given up on ever getting our love life back to where it was before I married my wife, I still think about the dynamics of the situation from time to time. And I've almost reached the conclusion that the lack of sex is just a trigger for the anger and resentment I often feel. I wonder if the real cause is that I see my wife as a taker? I see myself as giving so much in this relationship (I've taken on the entire financial responsibility so she can go back to school, I clean but still live amongst clutter, I run her errands, I cook . . . . I do quite a bit when I think about it). Meanwhile she focuses on those things that are important to her (her schooling, her shopping).
So I wonder if the underlying cause of frustration in most of our relationships is that we tend to be the givers in our relationships and our LD spouses tend to be the takers? The marriage is out of balance...... Maybe along the way in our marriages the takers have become unequal in that they stopped the sexual contact without giving more of the other things to make up for the imbalance. Maybe sex was the only thing they ever really gave even in the beginning.
What do ya'll think? Does this make any sense at all?
