Hairdog's 180?

[SolidMechanic]

APPRECIATE: recognize the worth of; esteem duly, be fully conscious of. raise in value

How does one show appreciation if not by doing things for them or saying things to them?

If compliments are brushed off and honey-dos are ignored then exactly in what way can a person show appeciation?

I think she brushed off the Words of Affirmation because she had the gain way up on her hidden agenda radar. She thinks Hairy may not have been sincere, that he was just trying to butter her up for sex. ("Last Tango in Paris" anyone?) Mrs. HD is always harping on trust, maybe that is one of the manifestations.

Hairy, next time you try to show appreciation and responds with "You are only saying that because I pointed it out to you", you can say "Right you are! You have legitimate complaints that I am trying to address. I will try to address your legitimate issues regardless of whether we make love, because ILY and it's the right thing to do."

This is what NOP is talking about. Unfortunately, the only way to get her to trust that your good will comes with no strings attached is to call a cease-fire on sexual initiation. I am not talking about giving in: "Yes dear, I will turn into NoSexPat and be your Best Friend For Life and nothing more." I'm talking about fixing her issues while holding onto your own sexual nature.

Once you have met her half way without making sexual requests, she will start running out of reasons to keep you away. I hope.

SM