I'm sorry that you're hurting, but I can't help but wonder if this is a crucible reaction from the Mrs. You're looking at this in the right way, IMO, but as the wise HP said, you have to speak clearly about your actions and intent.
Were I in your sitch, I would tell her that I didn't marry her with the idea that we WOULDN'T have sex, but just the opposite. I would clearly identify how she communicated that sex was important to her, too. I would tell her that I felt betrayed by her resistance to sex and by her most recent revelation.
BUT, I would then tell her that I accept her position as a boundary, however sadly, and would respect it. That would be the backdrop to say the Mojo/Corri quote.
I disagree with moving to the basement. Why should you have to leave your BR? She's the one with the open boundary now, not you. Let her go to the basement when she needs to get away. If you can't live in the same room w/her, you'll never keep your commitment to stick out the M.
Perhaps you should determine how long you can "hold out" under these circumstances and communicate it, also. This brought great clarity in my M! It also relieved a lot of pressure for me.
Good luck to you, buddy. I'll be praying for you to have the wisdom to do the right thing.
