Let me just run this up the flagpole and see if anyone salutes.
Did I mention this is a gross generalization? But I'm always searching for patterns. Or maybe this stuff is already obvious to everyone but me. Does it seem that IN GENERAL the LD person:
1) is more in need of being taken care of in order to want to be intimate (examples: GEL's husband likes the house clean; it makes him feel cared for. Wilde's wife what's to share decision-making even in small things like where to go for dinner. Corri wants her husband to take an interest in her projects. HD's want these things, too, but they are not a pre-condition of intimacy.) 2) wants the HD to take the emotional risk (resists initiating sex; often reluctant to say what's bugging them) 3) wants the HD to do the major work of the R-- not the "work" around the house, but the emotional work (HD has to initiate convos about the R, finds the C, etc.)
As I said in another thread, I used to accuse my husband of "hiding in the bushes" while I stood in the clearing revealing myself, sticking my neck out, taking the emotional risks. LDs seem more private, self-protective, defensive (if you will), sensitive to criticism... well, here goes: LAZY (when it comes to the R). There I've said it.
Did I mention these were GROSS generalizations? (Here come the frying pans!)
