Quote: The fact that he made that effort alone put me in a place where there was NO WAY ON PLANET EARTH that I would let him down... I would see mountains moved, oceans drained, the heavens torn asunder before I would ever consider throwing that back in his face.
I believe you HDs call this desire.
I am really happy for you and your H. However, taking into account that I can't speak for all HD folk, that isn't what I call desire. What you described is definitely a passionate expression of love but it isn't sexual desire. Sexual desire is an aching longing, not a loving flow of generousity.
What could your H do that would make you ache and long to feel his body joined with yours? He doesn't just want to receive from you sexually. He wants to be able to give to you sexually and he can't because you've implied that there is nothing sexual that you want. IMO this is what HD folk mean when they speak of desire. We "want to be wanted" sexually.
I know others will disagree but IMO it's great for someone to want to have sex with you because they love you but it's better for someone to want to have sex with you because they love you AND they desire you sexually. This is why I basically told my H that I will not accept the premise that he is doing me a favor by having sex with me. The only thing I am willing to trade for sex is sex.
Perhaps, your H feels differently and he will continue to give you what you need in exchange for sex. I just thought that I should alert you that it is possible that he is on the same wavelength as me.
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
