I woke up when I was secure in my mind that I could provide for my family. Not worried about how to pay for everything. I did the fast palm to the forehead when I was about to be a grandpa.
My problem was that I came from a poor family, always saw people strugling to pay bills and never had much as a kid. Family moved 6 times in 1955 because things were not going to well. Also, I do not rember being praised for doing anything except for mowing a coulle of really old widdows lawns when I was 15.
After I was married I never was secure in my belief that I was a good fininacial provider, or knew how to be a good parent. I did not beat my W or the kids, so I new I was not a bad person. I did not make as much money as the neighbors did where I decided to move.
When I bought the house we are still in (1974), the bank suggested I was spending too much (%of income)for housing. I told them I do not ever want a car loan, do not spend much for entertainment, and always have a fulltime and a partime jobs.
Well, after I have made it, ( house paid off, retirement funded, kids through college, grandkids here) I can see that I should have had more confidence when I was younger.
Back to Mr. HP. I hope he has more confidence in his and your situation. I suspect it will take less time for him to sharply move palm of hand to forehead and have an "Ah ha Moment."
I wish I could have some of those "hot momma" moments back.
