CAC4 try to see the shades of gray. Being ready to end a relationship has many levels, Living in another room of the house, seperation for a short time or a long time, and even divorcing and possibily remarrying the same W again.
I guess I still don't quite understand...but I'm trying! I just don't see that I have any "leverage" to speak of. moving to a different room would be anything but welcomed. "find some desire, or else..." or else what?"
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I used to feel taken advantage of in my R, wanted to avoid the angry remarks of W, and was told by W she did not have to worry about me being unfaithful to her because "NO BODY would ever want me." W was going to buy "Her self a condo." I finally got up the nerve and said go ahead. And do not expect me to dog sit, change channels (entertainment center gets locked up and you can not make any changes), or explain any investment litature to you.
ouch. that's harsh. In my case, it would be true...but still harsh! seriously...we don't have that sort of "nasty" dynamic going on. we never fight. we're not mean to each other. we just don't have sex, because one of us isn't interested.
Quote: If you let gargage hapen over and over again, resentment builds, and how can 10+ years resentment lead to a loving relationship?
it doesn't. I don't see how it possibly could. But at the same time, I don't see any way to avoid it, or change it. perhaps I just can't see the forrest for the trees.
seriously...we don't have that sort of "nasty" dynamic going on. we never fight. we're not mean to each other. we just don't have sex, because one of us isn't interested. 
