Last night was 'date night'...I'll take responsibility for it being a flop

After I put the boys to bed, H was sitting at the computer, so I logged on for a while to catch up on some mail. Just as I was finishing up, H walked by, and I asked if he wanted to do something.

'yeah, but you seem to be busy...' Aagh. strike one against me. I went downstairs where he was reading the paper, and started some small talk, it was pretty comfortable, except for the part when I said I wanted to dance.

H 'Well, there's the floor, you can get up and jump around yourself if you want'

I kind of laughed it off, and we went on talking for a while, H stood up, so I went and hugged him. He leaned on me for a while, then pulled away, so I kissed him, and he hugged me for a few seconds more before bolting off.

I decided to go upstairs and change into something 'more comfortable', but not blatently sexy, and lay on our bed reading. A little while later, H walked by and I called out 'hello'.

H 'oh, there you are, I wondered where you disappeared to.'

M 'Just got bored watching you read the paper. Would you come and sit and talk with me?'

H keeps himself busy picking stuff up etc. Earlier he refused to go for a walk since last time I had complained that he found all kinds of other things to do on our walks, so I decided against bringing up the point that he was doing that again...

We talked a little bit about nothing for a little while, but he never sat down. Then he said he wanted to finish up the Amazon order he was placing for my dad to bring with him when he comes in a few weeks, and asked if I would come and check if there was anything I wanted.

So that was it. we sat each at our own computers, throwing comments back and forth...which might even be nice if I knew there was more...finally I said I was going to bed (it was way after midnight), and went in to give him a kiss, asked if he was coming.

I put my arms around his neck, and he didn't pull back, actually at one point, he held on as I tried to pull away. This is the first sign of affection I've had from him in I don't know how many years...and the first time in a long time I really felt I could have sex with this man.

We didn't...but baby steps, right?

I'm still struggling with some feelings myself, which I'll try to put into words later if I get a chance, gotta go pick D8 up from school.

Oh, I just had a laugh. D6 asked me to tie her bandana (all the rage here right now) for her, and I noticed the name of the company was 'Have a Hank'. Took all I had to keep from laughing, as I didn't really want to have to explain...