There are two sayings that come to mind when I read your last post.
1) Insanity is doing the same thing over and over expecting different results each time.
2) Do the things you've always done and get the results you've always gotten....try something different.
I know how much it sucks to be the "bad guy" I have been told many times that the kids see me as the bad guy and have been told this from my wife! When S2 throws something across the room I tell him he is wrong and I make him sit on the couch. She he dumps his juice cup on the floor, I tell him he did wrong and I make him sit on the couch.
When D8 does something "bad" I am the one who tells her what she did was wrong and I am the one who grounds her from cartoons or what ever it is she wants to do at the time.
Wife always says they are just kids, they don't know any better. No sh!t they don't, no one is telling them they are wrong to do what they were doing. How can they possibly learn right from wrong if everything is ok since they don't know any better. I didn't grow up in the land of the "fruits and nuts" (no offense intended) where it is about how you feel and not what is right or wrong.
When I was growing up (not long ago I am only 35), parents where not afraid of their kids or of someone video taping them and maybe reporting them for abuse if they used a switch on the kid who was doing wrong. It didn't take long to figure out what was right and waht was wrong. One swat or even a friend getting a swat and you knew not to do that again.
No I do not advocate violence at all, there are many things you can do that does not cause physical pain but still gets the point across. But doing nothing will not get it done.
In your case, you will likely find even though your kids see you as the bad guy, they will respect you more then they do your wife IF you put your foot down. It is not too late to be the enforcer and your kids will be better for it in the long run.
Stay strong, make a change and stick to it for a while to see how it works. Good luck
dazedandconfuzed - knows it is much easier to give advice then take it but the Packers are 1-0!
